Ndiaye, Harlem Globetrotters-Style Skills and Sobering Soccer Statistics

IS THERE REALLY A POSSIBILITY?

If you haven’t seen the footage of Iliman Ndiaye executing a reverse bouncing nutmeg at Everton’s training ground, it’s worth viewing. Through performing a move so impressive that it would have been appropriate at a Harlem Globetrotters friendly display, the skill quickly concluded what was meant to be a lighthearted kickabout to conclude what had been – up to that point – an illuminating interview about how non-professionals can get another opportunity after being let go from professional academies.

Ndiaye, who competed in amateur leagues directly before being signed by Sheffield United at 19, is ideally suited to speak on this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to materialize,” he told a young player immediately prior to deploying said ninja move on his victim, in doing so perfectly illustrating the difference between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been working to minimize.

Ndiaye is far from the only professional footballer to go slightly overboard. A younger Michael Owen cheerfully overwhelming a 13-year-old goalkeeper in front of a smouldering Neville Southall is obviously the gold standard in this specific category – but the ex-Anfield star is not alone in this. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have reduced toddlers to actual tears with a series of harsh skills, although it’s believed that the latter was at least driven by the Japanese player’s social media regretful message – “difficulty breeds resilience” – and the related tag of #friendship.

Kagawa’s ex-BVB colleagues Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the decency to suffer a loss against 100 children when the three played during the mid-game pause of their final match for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that contained Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso were more competitive when they played against 109 Chinese kids in a like situation. But returning to the beginning, it’s calculated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing structured junior soccer in England will ever feature in the Premier League, a harsh truth for toddlers and teenagers across the country.

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FEATURED STATEMENT

“The game guided me but it never abandoned me because I never abandoned my dream. I went from location to location. The passion for soccer propels you. I couldn’t always see where it was directing me. But today I have the solution” – national team manager Veljko Paunovic pauses briefly from his training to reflect on his path.

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

“Pleasant to learn that Kevin Mac Allister won’t be excluded by Argentina. Hopefully, if he goes to the Bigliest Most Peaceful Cup next year, he’ll read up on how to navigate the tournament sites – wouldn’t want him to end up lost in New York” – James Humphries.

“Information shows that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been suspended due to alleged involvement in a gambling controversy. It would be fantastic if that number could be raised to the same level of typical pedantry associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my math, that’s about 33 more detail-oriented individuals. If I agree to be excluded from playing professionally in Turkey (hardly a difficult decision at my age and, um, talent), are there 32 more folks willing to participate in my quest for balance?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a regular follower and Florida resident, can I in advance protest about the coming period of published letters about which highway one uses to get to various locations in your country? I mean, I was stuck in gridlock on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the complete account. There’s no meaningful conclusion to the tale. (I-4 connects Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have congestion problems at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Regarding Wythenshawe FC, I recollect many years ago playing for a Sunday, very social side, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke presented as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who invited him. Apparently he was an actor; he had a useful left foot. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some co-workers and mates, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our most senior member is pushing 80, while the most junior are in their young adulthood. To ensure a positive atmosphere for everyone, we have a basic guideline regarding the quality of player: you can be quick or talented, but ideally not both. We sometimes have players who disregard this principle, but usually succeed in bringing them to our standard over time” – Lars Esbjerg.